Mr George Crane was a popular newspaper columnist, psychologist and physician in the United States.
He speaks of an experience of a wife who came into his office, full of hatred toward her husband.
Seeking a divorce, she blurted out, “I do not only want to get rid of him, I want to get even. Before I divorce him, I want to hurt him as much as he has caused pain to me.”
Dr. Crane suggested an clever plan:
“Go home and do this…
>> Act as if you really love your husband.
Pretend and tell him how much he means to you.
Go out of your way to be as kind, considerate, and generous as possible.
Spare no efforts to please him, to enjoy him. Make him believe you love him!
And, after you’ve convinced him of your undying love and that you cannot live without him, then drop the bombshell!
Tell him that you are getting a divorce.
That will really hurt him!
Hurt him to the core!”
With revenge in her eyes, she smiled and exclaimed, “Wonderful indeed! That is a superb way of settling scores with the one who hurt me the most!”
So off she went, doing what was told, with enthusiasm, acting “as if”
She showed love, kindness, listening, giving, reinforcing, sharing…
After two months, when she didn’t return, Dr Crane called. “So, are you ready now to go through with the divorce?”
“Divorce?” she exclaimed. “Never! I discovered I really do love him.”
>> Her actions had changed her feelings.
>> Her “affectionate” motions done with revenge, resulted in “loving” emotions with sincerity!
>> Her “acting” in actuality helped her to rediscover her lost love.
That’s the power of love!
Love is the best medicine for any sickness which cripples human life!
And the reason for this amazing power of love is simple:
>> True Love flows from the heart of the One who is Love… God!
>> Genuine Love gushes forth from the fount of the One who is Love Incarnate… Jesus!
The Gospel of the Day is a wonderful exposition of Jesus emphasizing on the importance of unity and faithfulness in the relationship of marriage.
The Church defines marriage as:
“The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring;
this covenant between baptized persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament.”
Marital love is patterned on the love that Christ has for each one of us….and the love with which we are to love the Lord.
We could understand this love, from three dimensions…
1. A Love that is obedient
Jesus says, “If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love” (Jn 15: 10)
Jesus remained in the love of the Father, by doing His commandments.
>> And he enjoins the same principle of Obedient Love to His disciples too.
The one who loves, also obeys…
>> The one who loves, also follows the commands…
Do I have a love that is obedient…?
… happy to undertake the various duties and responsibilities entrusted to me and fulfilling them to the best of my capabilities.
… willing to listen to each other’s needs and be sensitive to the concerns and wishes of the other
2. A Love that is sacrificial
Jesus says, “No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (Jn 15: 13)
Jesus showed the depth of His love by undertaking the highest sacrifice of His own life.
>> And he enjoins the same principle of Sacrificial Love to His disciples too.
The one who loves, also offers to forego some luxuries and securities…
>> The one who loves, also gives up many of the comforts and personal desires…
Do I have a love that is sacrificial?
… willing to lay down one’s bias and prejudices, dying to one’s evil inclinations, putting to sword one’s bad habits that takes away from God and making adjustments of one’s self-desires to make way for God’s plans in life.
… allowing my ego or selfish desires to take a back seat and bring into focus what is true, right and just?
3. A Love that is fruitful
Jesus says, “.. I chose and appointed you to go and bear fruit that will remain… ” (Jn 15: 16)
Jesus showed the quality of His love by displaying the fruits of compassion, tender mercy, an accommodating heart, gentleness and generosity.
>> And he enjoins the same principle of Fruitful Love to His disciples too.
The one who loves, also bears fruits of patience, kindness, self-control and faithfulness…
>> The one who loves, also lives a life that radiates the fruits of joy, generosity and peace…
Do I have a love that is fruitful?
… bearing fruits that witness God’s love by promoting unity and harmony and attracting many to the tender mercy of the Lord by a life of passion and zeal.
… showering forth fruits that sweeten the hearts of our loved ones and causes greater affections of commitment and faithfulness.
The Lord has loved us tremendously… with a love that is obedient, sacrificial and fruitful.
>> Each of us is to possess this same treasure of love.
Love binds every brokenness..
>> Love joins every divorced situation…
>> Love unites every ruptured circumstance…
May the Lord enable us to be filled from His fountain of love and share His joy and peace to a world that is broken and seeks for consolation, comfort and calm!
May the Lord fill us with an awareness of the sanctity and supremacy of Marriage and help us to persevere in, to preserve, and to promote this Sacred Sacrament.
God Bless! Live Jesus!